I Know This is Weird… Part 2

I’m spending Christmas Day with my future former wife, her boyfriend, my kids, and her family…. Really.

It will be weird, and we all know it. I’m sure most of you wonder about my sanity. I’ll bet a few of you believe I am unable to let go of our marriage, and that I really need counselling… or Prozac. It might be intriguing to some of you that know me. But, let me explain…

I am in a good place, emotionally and spiritually. I am experiencing what it means to be loved unconditionally by God through some key relationships in my life. I am not alone. My kids want me there. My future former father-in-law will be spending his first Christmas without his wife, who suffers from Alzheimer’s, and he could use the company. Greta and I are friends. She would like Scott and I to be friends… (confidentially, I don’t think we will be football-watching-beer-drinking-deer-hunting-deck-building-chew-spit-and-tell-each-other-how-tough-we-are friends, but he seems like a nice guy.) And I look good. I weigh about 215-220 from riding a bike to work. I’m gonna be aight

More than likely, this will be my last Christmas at Loy’s home. When Greta and I married, we spent almost every holiday with Loy and Marlene… her parents. I would have loved to spend some with my family, but we usually couldn’t afford it. After the death of my father when Greta and I were dating, while I was in college, Loy and Marlene accepted me into the rythms of their family. After 25 years, I guess you could say that it still has the feeling of normalcy to it. I think that will be tested this year, and that is probably good. We all need to say good-bye to Larry and Greta. We will always have a unique place in each other’s life. History… good and bad. In a strange sense, we will always be family.

And… its Christmas. We celebrate the birth of grace… forgiveness… love incarnate. Greta and I need to model the human incongruence of two people getting a divorce, yet striving to live out the grace of the Child in the manger. We each value the other… and we look forward to our respective lives lived seperately. And you know what? God is okay with that! That is a hard concept for some of you reading this. Frankly, it has been a hard truth for me to understand. But I do. God has the divine capability to love both of us and can accept where we are, AND still use us in the manner we were designed. He doesn’t judge us… He loves us… unconditionally. Those are vital statements for me. They are new to me, actually.

My kids want me there, too. I was a good father. I’ve finally decided that. I wasn’t perfect. But I loved them. I would still give my life for them. And they love me. That is nice to know. I am proud of them. I always will be. I pray that God will continue to lead them and intervene in their lives.

I hope Greta will find happiness and love.

I hope I will too.

But, all that is yet to be, so…


…and let the weirdness begin…


4 thoughts on “I Know This is Weird… Part 2

  1. I think this is great! My parents divorced more than 15 years ago and are still friends- sometimes we all spend holidays together, complete with their new partners. From a child’s perspective (even though I’m all grown up now) I can tell you it’s wonderfully reassuring to see your parents able to come together in peace and celebrate the happy times. It means that, while families change, they don’t disintegrate with divorce. Congratulations- I don’t think you’re weird at all.

  2. I think this is really great, Larry. I’m really proud of you and where you are right now. It was great to see you the other day!

  3. you said what you are going through and what you are feeling and what is ahead in a very effective and meaningful way. this day i’m sure is difficult but you are going to be ok. love you and hurt with you!

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